welcome to Book by the Beach

Hello & Welcome to Book By The Beach ☀️🌊

You may be familiar with my other blog expressions on The World Outside My Window and/ or King Kamille; in any case, I'd like to [re]introduce myself:

I am Kamille, a nontraditional student, studying Psychology and Philosophy in undergraduate school; with aspirations of contributing to society— in an enlightening, truthful, sincere, heartfelt way— from a space of love for humanity. I believe in DEI in the sense of allowing others to express themselves in their unique/ Diverse interpretation of God within a human experience. Equity in the way of which we all have special abilities and at times accommodation may be necessary [there's a translate option in case English is not the standard language for you]. And Inclusion, as all are welcome [however, be advised: the philosophy of the land is "do no harm" accompanied with "but, take no shit"- meaning, please be respectful of others should you choose to comment; we don't have to agree yet we must be respectful, kind, and genuine. Should you have a question or would like more information, feel free to reach out; as sharing information from various perspectives is how we grow, heal, and become "better" individuals within a collective community of like- minded Souls connecting from the frequency of love...

I was gifted with an idea to share books which have crossed my path along my spiritual, self-  discovery, enlightenment, awakening journey toward the destination of Infinite Intelligence [God] in the expression of various scriptures in biblical text. I've had the idea for some time now, however in all honesty the idea for the inaugural expression comes from a space of liberation. Recently, I discovered the longing to connect with a lover had overshadowed the true sentiment of love I desired from another— then I realized the "lover" I was connecting with was Me the whole time [but, that's a story for another blog]. As love was expressed, the response was confusing and a host of other things which are a bit irrelevant to the "story" of the actualization of what's to come within this blog. So, back to me— as a woman in middle adulthood I have chosen the lifestyle of a "spinster"; during early childhood I expressed my desire to become a nun yet rather than the concept being embraced, I was mocked. Life happens and I am welcomed to the sacred space of motherhood— with an single child within emerging adulthood, I am officially a "spinster" which is an unmarried woman without [dependent] children, with the exception of my emotional support best friend, Rocko [an 8 year old Shih Tzu mix].

In honest reflection I recently communicated with friends and ex- lovers of various "issues" within our interactions as many of them have established new relationships or are still seeking to find a companion. So I shared a couple of books and thought of how many young adults as well as others at various stages of life could benefit from the information being shared; as well as those who are familiar with these books, may revisit them or feel inclined to share their experience from the knowledge and understanding obtained, as not all of the books [or other forms of literary expression] will be centered around intimate relationships. The ultimate relationship I refer to is the relationship with self [intrapersonal] and God. From there, I believe we can better navigate relationships with others [interpersonal] allowing us to heal trauma and other forms of abuse, in order to grow and/or mature within the capacity of intelligence [mental as well as emotional], and other God given responses to the words shared. 

I will admit to mostly skimming the pages and applying the information through osmosis, however in the very near future [sometime between Fall 2025 and Spring 2026 semesters] I intend to truly read the following book, accompanied with the corresponding journal; with that I thought to share the information with the younger generation of women- those coming of age, experiencing the challenges of adolescents, those who are new mothers, and anyone identifying with the sacred, divine feminine of womanhood. 

With that in mind, some who are in relationships or have relationships with men- sons, fathers, brothers, friendships, intimate relationships would also benefit from the book within the same family of healing. Although, I have chosen to remain single- with a willingness for companionship, I am a woman who has experienced great loss in the conversation concerning love yet I have an overwhelming empathy for those striving to establish and maintain healthy, happy, honest, relationships which can overcome difficulties and last with both parties willing to heal, grow, have the difficult conversations in an effort to understand one another, and move forward whether together or a part— in a loving way which does not harm one another or the next person encountered— as we are all wounded or traumatized by societal roles, rules, norms, stereotypes, etc. lets not be yet another reason someone is in need of healing [because of their interactions with a shared experience].

Introductory Reading to begin our Book by the Beach experience:

Books can be found on Queen Afua's website

Sacred Woman — A Guide to Healing the Feminine Body, Mind, and Spirit is an in-depth comprehensive manual that teaches women how to heal themselves, their families and their communities.

The Sacred Woman Journal — A beautifully curated guide, aligns with the teachings and principles of Queen Afua's Sacred Woman, making it an impeccable complement and expansion to this timeless classic...

Man Heal Thyself — The Wellness Warrior's Journey To Self Mastery, shares practical tips and tools for men to strengthen their bodes, spirits and minds.

Circles of Wellness — A guide to creating a healer in every family and a wellness center in every home. This guide teaches how to make paradigm shifts to rethink and redo our personal and planetary health care. Learn to plan seeds of wellness and shift your consciousness from accepting suffering to expecting wellness. Learn to activate the teachings in Queen Afua's forty-year body of work as you shift to heal thyself and become citizens on the global community of wellness. Continue to grow and cultivate your family and community. Circles of wellness is based on natural, holistic emerald green lifestyle . By shifting to wellness thinking and wellness acting, you-Your family-Your community-your planet can begin harvesting collective greatness, 360, full circle.

For those in relationships or with family dynamics, honorable mentions are as follows:

The Energy of Emotions by Emily Maroutian

I found this information extremely useful as we all experience challenges with male/ female relationship [familial, professional, intimate, and other] dynamics with emotions and the expression of said emotions often at the forefront of many conflicts. As one may feel as if the other is too emotional or too nonchalant when expressing love, affection, displeasure, and other common topics of disagreement. Understanding the umbrella of emotions and finding the "root cause" or underlying issue can change [strengthen or weaken (in my opinion) the foundation within] the risk/ cost assessment of any relationship. When one or all parties involved feels unseen, unheard, misunderstood, or devalued the structure of the relationship in any capacity will suffer. The knowledge within this book has helped me understand myself and others much better.

The Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz

I recommend this book as it has helped me navigate some interpersonal relationship dynamics, as the agreements are:

1. Be Impeccable With Your Word.
2. Don’t Take Anything Personally.
3. Don’t Make Assumptions.
4. Always Do Your Best.

I will admit, being impeccable with my word, not making assumptions, and learning to always do my best [with the understanding that "my best" will fluctuate as I am in recovery from an experience of a stroke and remission of breast cancer, along with managing mental health awareness] however, I am still "a work in progress" when it comes to taking things personally. An area I am strengthening daily, doing my best to re-evaluate the inner thoughts of why the words, actions, or even silence and inaction of another Being causes me to internalize or speculate the meaning of said action or inaction. I'm positive those thoughts will make their way to another of my blogs in the near future...

Another concept worth mentioning would be The 5 Love Languages which are:

• Acts of Service
• Receiving Gifts
• Quality Time
• Words of Affirmation
• Physical Touch

When experiencing established relationships, whether long term, rekindling, or forming new bonds I have found that understanding the way in which someone feels and receives the expression of love from another differs with each interaction— at times we may communicate with a loved one how we love, cherish, and other endearing sentiments— if we do not know, understand, or acknowledge how they feel when particular displays of affection are given we may miss the mark or miscommunicate intimately, which can effect the longevity of the relationship.

Throughout the process of expressing these words I am compelled to share a reflection of two (2) meaningful relationships of yesteryear. In both situations, I was unhealed and unaware of the hurt, pain, indifference, intolerance, and extremely high guard, standards, and boundaries I'd exuded when meeting both gentlemen. As I met a handful of gentlemen during emerging adulthood, particularly at the age of twenty- three (23); entering the work force and providing for myself and a young child— I was not "marriage minded" or having thoughts past survival [maintaining the well- being of myself and my child, being financially responsible enough to move from my family home to a dwelling of our own space, reliable transportation, livable wages, etc.] I focused on expressing myself creatively, having fun, as well as learning, and embracing new experiences. 

For a bit of a back story, I've only had a total of four (4) "boyfriend's" beginning in adolescence —at the age of fourteen (14) another at approximately sixteen (16) or seventeen (17) , the shortest relationship of less than a week at the age of  twenty- three (23) with one (1) of the aforementioned gentlemen, and the last time I committed to the title of being someone's "girlfriend" was at age twenty- six (26). I find this information relevant as the exchange with the gentlemen holding my record for shortest relationship, I said some things and behaved in some ways in which I felt regret. As our history has had more than it's "fair share" of adversity; one of the major things that came from it was an introspective accountability with changed behavior as the apology. Ironically, the changed behavior became an addition to the lifestyle I identify with and in turn, although, the "relationship" was short-lived, the friendship remained for many years and I am a better woman for said encounter. 

I say all of that to say, I've made plenty of "mistakes" along the road of "love"; as a person who did not value love— outside of the love of/for God, the sacred bond within the role of motherhood, self love, and the overall love of humanity— the relationship in my late teens altered the capacity of which I thought I could love another. As our love for one another was expressed and conversations of marriage and at least one (1) child was discussed and agreed upon. However, unfortunate series of events left me no choice, but to end a dream far from that of my youth. At this point I'd decided to commit to myself and singlehood; yet a happenstance resulted in a fantastic gift of my one (1) and only child... Followed by an unforeseeable tragedy with my first love [the one I expressed my deepest hopes, dreams, passions, and thoughts— while we spoke, listened to music, watched football (although we were in separate places), our conversations were philosophical, meaningful, thoughtful, kind, and loving] after which I truly committed to a toxic expression of "no strings attached" relationship styles. 

Unfortunately, the last two "boyfriends" experienced two (2) different versions of me; learning from the twenty- three (23) year old me, the twenty- six (26) year old version of myself had made serious adjustments to the way in which my language within the dynamic of the relationship had changed from pessimist to optimist; in addition to allowing myself to be more vulnerable. The causes for both relationships ending were vastly different however, the one in which I wish I could have a "do over" with was the short- lived relationship turned friendship and finally ended due to misunderstandings and miscommunication [on both parts] nevertheless, I am opening myself to the idea of companionship in the distant future. With that, I thought to share the above in a way of expressing an aspect within myself yearning for a creative outlet with the intention of enhancing existing relationships, healing within, and the growth necessary to choose love along with choosing yourself, and those you love.

I pray my experience may act as a "cautionary tale" of a young woman encountering two (2) exceptional loves in this lifetime; with a slight desire to experience that type of love again. Though both gentlemen were loved in different ways for different reasons, the acknowledgement of where things are currently, I am uncertain whether the future will have a surprising rekindling or if I will make myself emotionally available to embrace a romantic relationship with another aside from myself. I hope my words provided clarity, provoked thought, and/ or raised questions for introspection, dialogue within a relationship, or some sort of enlightenment in the realm of interpersonal and intrapersonal relationship dynamics.

Until next time,

King Kamille 🖤✨